obsessing or controlling.

Stop playing tug-of-war.

Letting go can be like a tug-of-war with God.


Have you ever played tug-of-war with a puppy and an old sock or a toy? He pulls. You pull it out of his mouth. He grabs hold again and shakes and shakes and says grrrrrr. The harder you tug, the harder the puppy tugs. Finally, you just let go. Then he comes right back again for more.

I have never successfully treated or solved one problem in my life by obsessing or controlling. I've yet to accomplish anything by worrying. And manipulation has not wrought one successful outcome. But I forget that from time to time.

The best possible outcomes happen when I let go. That doesn't mean I always get my way. But things work out and, ultimately, the lesson becomes clear. If we want to play tug-of-war, we can, but it's not an efficient problem-solving skill.

God, help me surrender to Your will.
You are reading from the book:
More Language of Letting Go © 2000 by Melody Beattie. All rights reserved. Printed in the United States of America. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the permission of Hazelden.

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